Breaking Down Tonight’s Game Seven
by Tommy Gimler Unlike most men, baseball doesn’t kill my erection. It induces one. And if there is a Game 7 involved, unless she’s holding a poster of Rosie O’Donnell scissoring Kathy Bates, let’s...
View ArticleProbably The Worst Thing I’ve Heard Since My Grandma Farted In Church
by Tommy Gimler Why do untalented people in this country continue to chase their dreams of being a superstar? Two words. Well, at least one of them is a word: Lil Wayne. I had a couple of different...
View ArticleYou Stay Classy, Giants Fans
by Mike Gemme I just watched this for the first time and it pisses me off to no end. Check out the 3:40 mark of the video below to see Giants fans boo Tommy Lasorda as he’s being honored for his WWII...
View ArticleAnalyzing The Ramblings Of An Absolute Dipshit
by Tommy Gimler Since the World Series is pretty much over, we’ve decided to have some fun by analyzing the words of Tim McCarver, who has to be suffering from some form of dementia. How he’s still...
View ArticleHey Kids! Take PED’s And You’ll End Up Getting $16 Million
by Tommy Gimler Here’s something that’s more disgusting than Steve Buscemi’s teeth. R.A. Dickey just won the National League Cy Young Award, and he is having trouble getting a reasonable offer from...
View Article2013 MLB Over/Under Win Totals Are Out
by Tommy Gimler The Atlantis Casino in Reno might be as irrelevant as Mindy McCready’s life 364 days of the year, but for the last seven years, they have been the first sportsbook to release Major...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Like Taylor Swift, These MLB Players Will Be Overpaid Pieces Of Shit In 2013
by Tommy Gimler According to Forbes, Taylor Swift made $57 million between May 2011 and May 2012. That’s quite a haul for an untalented piece of pig shit. And during the 2013 MLB season, you’ll be...
View ArticleClik here to view.
DUD MLB Preview: San Francisco Giants
by Tommy Gimler The only shitty thing about winning the World Series is that the following year, there is nowhere to go but down. Well, unless you’re Pablo Sandoval’s weight. It’s no secret that with...
View ArticleClik here to view.
Get The Shit Out Of Your Ears: Our First DUDcast
by Tommy Gimler and Michael Louis What do you get when you lock five sports fans and a comedian in a condo loaded with two bottles of Glenfiddich, eighteen Bud Lights, and a high-speed internet...
View ArticleOne Ballplayer And One Turd Who Shouldn’t Be Leading Their Positions In...
by Teddy Westside Normally I talk hockey, but I certainly know about other sports as well, you hookers. And here is a short, short like your cock list of 2 people that shouldn’t be allowed to sniff my...
View ArticleThe DUD MLB Midseason Report: NL East
by Tommy Gimler If you had Colorado’s Michael Cuddyer owning the season’s longest hitting streak at 27 games, you’re a fucking liar. Likewise, nobody pegged the Pittsburgh Pirates to own baseball’s...
View ArticleThe DUD MLB Midseason Report: NL West
by Tommy Gimler If you had Colorado’s Michael Cuddyer owning the season’s longest hitting streak at 27 games, you’re a fucking liar. Likewise, nobody pegged the Pittsburgh Pirates to own baseball’s...
View ArticleJust How Pig Shit Awful Are The San Francisco Giants Right Now?
by Tommy Gimler There will be a new Major League Baseball World Series champion when the season comes to a close this October, and that is because the San Francisco Giants are pure dog shit. The...
View ArticleRickie Weeks Done For Season After Proving He Is Worst, Dumbest Fucking...
by Tommy Gimler Our days of sticking up for this pile of pig shit are over. Even B.J. Upton, Dan Uggla, and Adam Dunn wouldn’t do what Rickie Weeks did to himself Wednesday night. With the Brewers...
View ArticleHere’s How Our MLB Predictions Stood Up Against The “Experts”
by Tommy Gimler Let’s be honest. If you put your entire unborn child’s community college fund behind our MLB over/under predictions this year, you’re a fucking idiot. Now is as good of a time as any...
View ArticleClik here to view.
The DUD Hands Out Their MLB Hardware
by Tommy Gimler We’ll let Tim Kurkjian calculate who is this year’s National League MVP from his grandma’s basement. But if you’re looking for awards like “Player Who Took Down The Hottest Piece Of...
View Article2014 MLB Over/Under Win Totals Are Out, You Hookers
by Tommy Gimler The thugs in Vegas have released the 2014 over/under win totals for all 30 Major League Baseball teams, and let’s just say there are a few more surprises than getting into a car with...
View ArticleClik here to view.
DUD MLB Preview: NL West Projected Standings
by Frank Rhombus The Dodgers are 1-to-3 favorites to win the NL West this year, so there’s as much value in making that bet as there is in trying to have an emotional relationship with Lindsay Lohan....
View ArticleClik here to view.
Unacceptable Jerseys For True Baseball Fans – Volume 2
by “Dirty” Mike Valley So Gim goes to this Brewers-Pirates game, and he says he almost blew chunks tailgating at Miller Park because he just parties that fucking hard. But I would assume that he...
View ArticleClik here to view.
The Most Overpaid MLB Players Of 2014 So Far
by Tommy Gimler You know B.J. Upton is going to make the list, but who else is going to join him on the podium of overpaid turds? 6. B.J. Upton – OF, Atlanta Braves – $14.05 million The Atlanta Braves...
View Article